Happenings

Linking up with Carissa today.

1.  We had a CRAZY weekend that I'm glad we made it through!  Saturday was non-stop from the boys'  first t-ball game, to dress rehearsal for my students, to shooting a wedding. 

 

We had a little t-ball practice of our own last week, in preparation for their debut!

 

2.  Chris and J-Man were sick for Fathers Day so we had a day of rest, which was greatly needed.  We did stop by each side of the fam to deliver presents to our dads, but other than that, we watched movies pretty much all day.  I think it was Chris's ideal Fathers Day, minus the being sick part.

 

3.  E had his 4-year-old checkup last week and didn't do so hot on his eye test.  So we have an appointment scheduled with an optometrist later this week.  I know it's not a big deal if he needs glasses, but I still just hope he doesn't have to deal with it, you know?

 

 

Happy Monday to all of you!



 

 

 

To Adoptive Dads

Here's to the adoptive dads, my husband included.  Happy Fathers Day!  You guys have a tough job.  Tougher than most, I'd say. 

Both of our sons came into our family with a lot of resistance toward their new Daddy.  One from an Ethiopian orphanage where he had probably never met a man and simply didn't trust this one.  One having a picture etched in his mind of men as mean, scary, hurtful. 

Chris has had a tough road to forge with each of our children and he's still forging it.  I've seen him walk through incredible discouragement, through pain, through anger, through sadness.  It's not his fault our kids couldn't trust him for a time, it wasn't his fault they were afraid of him, but he paid the price anyway.  It wasn't fair.  But he endured it and kept trying and kept loving them and kept believing that one day it would get better.

So to the adoptive dads who have gone through those struggles and for those still in them, here's to you.  You don't get enough credit or thanks.  But you have an incredibly important job that will make a lasting difference in the lives of your kids.  Keep going.  Keep loving.  Keep hoping.

Summer

Summer has seemed funny to us since we graduated from school.  Sort of anti climactic, I guess.  If you don't go to school, work in education, or have children in school, summer is really just another season, isn't it?  No breaks.  No less work.  No additional time with anyone.  Just business as usual, really.

That aside, I enjoy the season.  I hate the heat.  We have basically no humidity here, but it's in the 100's all summer.  Bleh.  But I like the swimming, the tans, festive atmosphere most people create.  Here are some things we have planned for this summer:

1.  Today my kids start T-ball, which is the first organized sport either of them have participated in so I am looking forward to a new page turned in the parenting book.  T-ball will last through most of summer for us. 

2.  I am shooting a wedding this weekend. 

3.  My teaching gig wraps up this month and I've decided not to return next year (hey, I guess I do work in education!  haha.  It's only an hour a week, though, people!).  With the difficult year we've had concerning J-Man, the teaching has just been too much.  So we've decided I need to step away from it for a while.  I'm actually really looking forward to just doing photography next year.  I can make my own schedule that way!

4.  Next month is J-Man's Gotcha Day.  And toward the end of the month, we are planning a trip to visit my sister-in-law and to see J-Man's other brother whom we have not seen in 2 years.  I'm nervous, but glad we are doing this.

5.  This is our first summer at our apartment complex, which means it's our first summer with a pool at our constant disposal.  We may be down there every single day, if E has his way!

And as for our hopes for the summer:

1.  The boys keep asking me if we can go to the beach.  We'd love to camp at the beach or in the mountains sometime this summer, but we'll have to see if that actually happens...money, time off, you know!

2.  I would love to take the family berry picking sometime soon.  We did that last year and it was really fun!

What are you most excited about for the summer?  (Even if that doesn't mean anything changes in your schedule!)

Library Fits

 

This morning I took the boys to storytime at the library.  When we got home, Chris asked, "Any fits?"  Because I can't recall the last time we went to the library without it ending in a huge fit by J-Man.  I don't know what it is, but when we are leaving, there is always something that sets him off...the fact that he has to hold my hand before we walk outside or who gets to carry the receipt or the fact that he's in trouble for the scream he just let out.  But today...ahhhhh...today there was no fit. 

I guess just another sign that he's doing so much better.

On Poverty and Stuff

I need to tell you a story.  God has been challenging us lately with our money.  He's been asking us to go further with the risks we take and the love we show.  And we've been scared, too scared to do it. 

 

"I'm convinced that God did not mess up and make too many people and not enough stuff.  Poverty was created not by God but by you and me, because we have not learned to love our neighbors as ourselves."  - Shane Claiborne The Irresistible Revolution

 

The early church "had everything in common" (Acts 2.44) and there were "no needy persons among them" (Acts 4.34).  Does that describe our churches today? 

 

The idea should be that we all take care of each other.  God gives to each of us not so that we can hoard it while others remain needy, but so that we can share and in turn, be shared with.  But when you take the risk to really give, it is scary because that means you are going to need someone else to give to you when you need it.  WE HAVE TO TAKE THAT RISK, Church!  That's what I'm learning.

 

We had extra money left from our tax return that we decided to save for the winter when my husband's business slows down and we need a little supplementing for our income.  Then we started feeling really convicted that we were holding onto this money in case we needed it in 6 months when there are people around us who need it NOW.  Our cousins came to mind.  They are in the middle of an international adoption and have been needing financial help in that process. 

 

We decided to give the money to their adoption.  I looked on her blog and she had just posted the amount they needed to bring their son home from Latvia for the summer ("hosting" him since they would not be able to finish the adoption and permanently bring him home until the fall).  The amount they needed "asap" to bring him home for summer was the exact amount we had to give!

 

So we sent off the check yesterday.

 

This morning my husband had coffee with a friend from church who told him they have been feeling they should reach out to us and help us financially if we need it.  He told Chris we can tell them when we need financial help.

 

It was like God stepped in and said, "Laurel and Chris, you don't have to worry about whether or not I will take care of you.  When you take that risk and do what I've asked you to do by taking care of your brothers and sisters, I WILL come through for you when you need it." 

 

It is so incredibly huge to us to know that there are others.  There are others who want to live this way, too.  Because that means we can freely give to those who need, and we can know our brothers and sisters will freely give to us when we need.  THAT is beautiful picture of God's family.

2013

At the beginning of 2013, Chris and talked about how nice it would be to take this year and just rest a little.  We've had some pretty crazy years lately with moves, job changes, adoptions.  We settled into our apartment at the end of 2012, our businesses were more or less up and running, and we had no plans of adding another child to our party any time soon.  (No, this is not a "we're adopting again!" announcement so stop that thought right there!) 

We felt like we needed a year to just be.  To not make huge life changes. 

And then J-Man hit a new developmental stage and stuff hit the fan, if you know what I mean.  It got really ugly in this little apartment.  Over the last several months, we've been getting some help, doing some therapy, reading more on trauma and adoptive parenting, taking care of ourselves, attending support groups, etc. to get our family back to a place of health.  And the progress has been incredible!

So now we're halfway through 2013 and we realize the first half was pretty much engulfed in heading toward crisis with J-Man in a place of intense anger and fear, and then putting in all the work that has been required to avoid said crisis and bring healing to our son and our relationship with him.

Thank God we hadn't planned on any huge life changes because God obviously knew we'd have enough on our plates for the first half of the year!

But now we look toward the rest of 2013 and we want to rest.  We need to rest.  Yet we have all these dreams, too.  We want to adopt again eventually, we want to go on an adventure some place new, Chris wants to get back into fulltime ministry eventually.  All these things take time and planning, but I don't know if we have it in us right now.

Have you ever been there?  Time just gets to you, doesn't it?  It's always ticking away and years are always finishing up and there's just so much you want to do.  But sometimes you just need a breath, a season of stillness.  I, for one, find it hard to take that season and trust I'll still have time to do all the things I want to do. 

So right now I just don't know.  I don't know what we're going to do with our lives or where we'll live or when we'll go or who will join our family.  If God says go, we want to go, no matter how worn out we are.  I guess we just need to pray! 

Today

Yesterday, Chris and I celebrated our 6 year anniversary!  I'm so grateful for him. 

We went on a fun date last night to sushi and a movie and our boys stayed the night with my in-laws.

Today we got to see Chris's sister and her family briefly before they went back home (a few hours away).  It was good to see them, even briefly.

Today we get to help out with an Adoption Celebration Dinner our church Orphan Ministry is putting on.  Steak dinner, a fantastic band, and a live auction with all proceeds going directly to 2 families in our church who are in the process of adopting from Ethiopia.  I can't wait!

Have a fabulous Sunday!